I wondered about the metal bars
on the headboard of a bed
so high I had to take a run
at it, and jump towards you.
our old common ground
the avid seeking of pleasure,
and getting your mouth covering my nose and my mouth.
stop. I can’t breathe
My back and forth head, ignored
You hate being interrupted
Only your voice, and now, only your air?
I would have to breathe the air in your mouth
I concentrated I needed whatever
Air was breathable, and I wasn’t sure how much would keep me
Alive, so I went still, I slowed everything down
Hades’ kingdom is your mouth
Slow everything down while I have to stay here
Endure this cold desire, this winter wait,
You are the cold winter I must lie below,
I must let myself be alive to my own desire, so I can return,
so I can leave, escape via the long staircase to the outdoors, spring away from this doomed house
Later I wondered
had French film maker told you
subdue her, she’ll like it?
It wasn’t an accident, an out-of-practice awkwardness
You had done this before
News in Toronto, suffocation is a sexual ploy:
I would lay
A bet about the bars on your bed.
Where are the body snatchers
The men who bagged others for the navy
Anyone tall enough to throw this bag over your head
And tighten the knot. How many lashes on the deck before you thought of how awful
it was what you did to me: never enough.
You will only think of you, no matter where you have been shanghaied.
Her Old Boyfriend is Up
I am always coming to, just as I am
about to fall off the edge of the bed
He’s got god’s thumb between his legs
I drive away within a Hammond B-3 tremulo,
radiating waves of pleasure beaming outward and out —
I could make Toronto really happy, just
by making love to him, then driving —
street after street surprised
by how suddenly happy everyone is
no one sure where the buzz is coming from
nor what Hz
But, like him, it seems familiar and good, and now
everywhere, a small hum in the back bottom of people’s mouths
Let that hum have its way
If this continues,
he will hire another pretty girl to fix his porch, or mend his mailbox
as his civic prize for favours to the city
because of what he has done to Hannah
who is moving away from him,
heading easterly through the city,
leaving no leafy street undone
all, radiant with oscillation